I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
