i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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