Sponge bath it is.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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