We won't sleep together?
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
