he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
