she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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