should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
