Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
