The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
