i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize