some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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