Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
