This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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