Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Please don't give away my fajitas
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