Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Randomize
