Your mouth is God's brothel.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
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