i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
