So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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