i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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