I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
