i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
