I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
