I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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