How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
