she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
