There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Welp...herpes.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize