Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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