are you still at the devil's house?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
