If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
