If that was your dad, he is hot
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize