i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
