My brain says no but my pants say off.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
