dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
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