he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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