we're blogging at a bar
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Randomize
