does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
