Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize