They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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