I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
