i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
