is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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