But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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