allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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