i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
