this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
