you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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