That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
