I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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