I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
