Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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