my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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