The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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